Please help me revise a speech for the election!?

It’s really bad! Be as critical as possible without being mean!
Candidates’ Environmental Plans

Polar bears are going extinct because of the melting ice burgs. The temperature is increasing 5°C every century. Global warming is causing the ozone layer, Earth’s protection against the sun’s harmful rays, to become weaker. These dilemmas are all part of one issue in our election: the environment . Both candidates devised plans to improve the environment in our country. Their plans will cover pollution, alternative energies and fuels, drilling for oil, cars, greenhouse gas emissions, green jobs, and much more. Both candidates acknowledge the fact that human pollution is a significant cause of global warming, but who has the best plan to help solve that and other problems? Barack Obama and John McCain have very different views on this subject.
Senator Obama has a very strong environmental plan. He is very supportive in investments in alternative forms of energy. He plans to spend 0 billion in environmental- friendly energies and fuels in the next ten years. I’m pleased that he is putting so much devotion in alternative energy, but where does that “investment” come from? Inevitably , some of that mammoth amount will have to come from our taxes. This democrat will produce new businesses working on wind, solar, and bio-fuels, along with millions of new “green” jobs. That will help the economy immensely. Barack Obama says 1 million hybrid cars will be running by 2050 if he becomes president. They run on batteries, and don’t require gas. Also, by 2012, 10% of electricity will be renewable, and greenhouse gases will be lowered 80% by 2050. He will try to eliminate oil imports from the Middle East within ten years. This means less taxes on gas. He mostly opposes drilling for oil domestically, but might do it as a last resort. He is neutral on nuclear energy, since it would be very expensive. Also, Barack Obama will require all cars to meet fuel efficiency expectations, so it will take less fuel to fill up American’s tanks. He supports the protection of natural places from development, which I believe all Americans should do. Humans have already destroyed the homes of too many animals. However, the senator is neutral on schemes to help save endangered species from extinction. In my opinion, this is despicable. We should transfer the energy and effort we put into unimportant matters to helping our fellow animals live happy lives and flourish. Although Barack Obama’s plan is wonderful, do they measure up to John McCain’s?
John McCain has a well- developed solution to the environmental issue. His energy plan is called the Lexington Project. This plan will help America break dependency with foreign oil, improve transportation, promote energy efficiency, and help global warming. McCain states, “In a world of hostile and unstable suppliers of oil, this nation will achieve strategic independence by 2025.” McCain will reward people who buy clean cars. The “Clean Car Challenge” will provide a 00 tax credit to any purchaser of a zero carbon emission car. Also, he will require automakers to switch to flex fuel, which lasts longer and is better for the environment than regular fuel. He will use and create new alternative energies and fuels, but won’t make investments as large as his opponent. He strongly supports nuclear energy, unlike Barack Obama. He says it is very safe; the military has been using it for years. John McCain also plans to drill for oil in Alaska. This will lower prices in ten years. The republican says it is a long process that will pay off in the end. Although it would be helpful, there is a chance it can result in a lot of pollution if the oil spills. To people concerned about that, Senator McCain says that the ships are very secure, so a spill would be unlikely. He plans to drill in the National Petroleum Reserve, but not in the Artic Wildlife Refuge. I believe that both of these places should be left untouched. They are protected for a reason; they’re pristine and beautiful in every way. John McCain will lower greenhouse gas emissions 50- 60% by 2050, 30- 20% less than Barack Obama plans to lower it. As you can see, McCain also has a well- thought out energy/ environment plan.
Now that you know each candidate’s methods to improve the environment, it is time for you to make the decision: Barack Obama or John McCain? You are not only voting for president, you are voting for the course of action to put an end to global warming, prevent pollution, fuel our cars, saves the polar bears, and much more. It is a very critical time, and everybody needs to use their voice. Vote 2008!

thank you!
So, it would be "increasing 5 degrees C (41 degrees F)"?
I know I kept on repeating words, so can you tell me what words I repeated the most, and good words to replace it?

2 Responses to “Please help me revise a speech for the election!?”

  1. Maus Says:

    IceBERG. One word. Iceberg.
    Global Warming is not causing the ozone layer to go thinner, man-made harmful gases are. CO2 that comes from cars and factories build up in the atmosphere and create the greenhouse effect, which causes Global Warming. So actually the ozone has nothing to the with Global Warming, but both are getting worse due to human activity.

  2. *The DA's Biggest Fan* Says:

    I think it’s quite good. What are Barack Obama’s thoughts on offshore drilling. I would also convert that 5 degrees Celsius into farenheit, too (the statement would be like this "increasing by 5 degrees Celsius (x degrees Farenheit)